By Deetra La’Rue
Have you ever met a woman that was so desperate for love, she gave up her entire being just for a corner of a man’s heart? The old saying goes, “A piece of a man is better than no man”. But, no man is worth having if he doesn’t add to a woman’s life, but takes away from her value. At some point in her life, every woman has dreamed about her ideal man, planned her wedding and even picked out names for her unborn children.
But to what extent would she be willing to go to get that “happy” ending? Is losing her sense of identity worth the cost of being happy? Unfortunately, a lot of women become so caught up in the things that they want, that they neglect to take care of their own needs. Rather than be patient and wait on the man that God has for us, we instead try to create him. However, sometimes what we want is not necessarily what we may need.
What we fail to realize is that you can be in a relationship with someone, but not have ownership of their heart. In other words, what good is it to have the key to a man’s heart, if it doesn’t unlock it? No matter how hard we try to twist and turn the lock, it fails to open. In more ways than one, relationships are a lot like puzzles. We as women have all the pieces (signs), but are too afraid to put it together, because the whole idea of being finished (broken up) scares us, because there’s nothing left to do, but move on.
Rather than move on, we frantically check the box (hold on) hoping that maybe all of the pieces aren’t there. Truth of the matter, they always were. But, for some apparent reason, we can’t fathom the idea of being alone. Immediately, we find fault and blame ourselves for the demise of our relationship, because of something we may or may not have done. Therefore, we change ourselves and try to fit the description of what someone says we should be.
As a result, we ultimately end up not liking the person we’ve become. While we were so busy finding love, we managed to lose ourselves in the process. What’s even sadder is a man doesn’t realize he had a good woman until she’s gone. Even then, he still doesn’t realize, because he never paid enough attention to even know she was there. Besides, I don’t want a man whose ego is bigger than his heart.
He’ll never be able to love me, because he’s too busy loving himself. Truth be told, a woman should never fall for a man and expect him to pick her up, when he is the sole reason she is down. Love is a beautiful thing, but it means nothing when you can’t feel it! Ladies, know your worth and know when to move on.
Deetra La’Rue
©2012
“Who’s that girl”?
Fearless, fabulous and fun, Deetra La’Rue is a 29-year-old author and writer from Montgomery, Alabama. Growing up, she had the “helping gene”, and always wanted to be an Attorney and Counselor, which led her to obtain her Bachelors of Science in Political Science (2007) and Master’s in Counseling (2012), both from Troy University. However, no matter which direction she chose to take, “The Pen” always proved mightier than the sword. Aside from her current job as a Student Affairs Specialist, Deetra enjoys fashion, spending time with her family and has plans to publish her three poetry books.
