By Tonya Allen
I recently read a devotional that convicted me recently. The topic was “Stay Out of It!” and it focused on I Timothy 5:22 and how it warns us not to share in other people’s sins. The devotional was referring to a husband who was doing wrong things like the other people on his job. This guy was overwhelmed with guilt because he knew what he was doing was wrong. Everything in his life was going wrong. He confessed his sin and made everything right at work and his home and his personal life starts coming back together. The whole point of this story is when you see others doing wrong this is your opportunity to stand up for Christ and do the right thing.
In our marriages, we often make poor decisions and do the wrong thing. We know it is wrong but we get so much pleasure out of it that we disregard the warning signs and keep moving forward. For example, it is so easy to do the wrong thing but harder to do what we know is right. When I married my husband it was for always, forever, for love, and for keeps. I remember standing there before Christ, and in front of his family and my own family, telling everyone that I was going to stay with him until death separated us. He in turn promised me the same thing.
I often sit down and watch Divorce Court and it amazes me how easily people go running to the judge for a quick divorce when they have reached the first or second hard situation that arises in their marriages. I watch the surprise on the husband’s face when he hears for the first time, the real reason why his wife has decided to abandon him. He never knew that she was lonely and hungry for his attention and affection. At other times, it is the wife who is simply clueless because all her husband wanted from her was some security or affection. He wanted her to take a little time to do something special for him instead of all of her focus going toward the children.
In front of the Judge should never be the first time your spouse should hear your concerns. I know that it is never too late to try and resolve the problems that arise in your marriage, but Divorce Court is definitely not the place to seek counseling. There are churches that have married couples ministry and God’s teaching is going forward. Marriage counselors are sincere about providing you with the necessary food needed for your marriage. The resources are available and it is important to find mentors who are willing to provide Godly counsel. We all have problems with communicating with our spouses. At today’s food and gas prices, finances are a concern in everyone’s marriages. It is important to discuss how our extended families, especially in-law relationships, can put a strain on our marriages. Just simply forgetting to date one another and participating in pillow talk can leave room for the devil to sneak in between you and your spouse and cause problems. Through counseling, church ministries, or mentorship, you can invest in your marriage and discover how to put your marriage on the right course, 4 Always, 4 Ever, 4 Love, 4 Keeps!
Tonya can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Tonya and her husband Robert were Married Couples Ministry leaders for 16 years at Freewill Missionary Baptist Church, Montgomery, Alabama.
All rights reserved, Gumptown Magazine. Copyright 2018.